A List of Reasons Why Being Pregnant Sucks

First official blog post while being far along enough in pregnancy (15 weeks) to actually have an opinion about carrying a tiny human; very exciting for all, I know. So, what's my opinion?

I. Hate. Being. Pregnant.

Don't get me wrong. I am still happy about having a baby, but the process of making said baby is not fun. For the strong in stomach and spirit, what follows is my list of reasons why you should only not use protection if you really, really want a child.

(A warning. I talk about gross stuff. Don't read this list if you don't want to hear me complain about bodily functions.)

1. "Morning" Sickness

The first 2 weeks of after our positive result were non-eventful; just a bit more peeing than normal, which prompted the test taking in the first place. 

Then, the 7th week hit, and I felt like every single thing I put in my mouth was doomed to a quick and violent exit. Oh wait, that's because it was. It got to the point that I was picking out food just for the ease of vomiting. (By the way, rice is pretty easy to vomit, but spaghetti is probably the worse thing ever in said situations.)

Yeah, pretty much like this.

When I couldn't even hold down water, I decided it was time for a visit to my OB/GYN. To condense the visit, I have a lovely condition called hyperemesis gravidarum, which is like morning sickness, only times a million and instead of gradually fading away after the first trimester, continues until baby has left the premises. 

I was prescribed Zofran, which I would highly recommend to all ladies who think they need to suffer through three or four face to toilet trips a day. Although I am still nauseous, I hold down food, which, though I am not a doctor, I believe is good for me and the baby. 

2. I Miss Pooping

I won't go into details here, mostly because I don't know how much more clear I can be about being constipated. This one might not be completely fair to blame on pregnancy, since Zofran, my miracle no-throwy-upy-pill lists not pooping as one of its side-effects, but I do know for a fact that it does come with the territory. 

God, I am so jealous of how much this cat poops.

So yeah. This sucks and you can't really complain about it in public the way you can being nauseous. Nausea, for some reason, is a safe topic to go to when discussing your pregnancy, but try to bring up any other uses for the toilet, and suddenly you've broken some sort of social mores. Explain that one to me.

3. Breasts are No Longer Fun

I have never been particularly flat chested (thank you, Hiatt genes), but this was actually the second pregnancy symptom that became instantly obvious to me, after the frequent urination. Since they dramatically increased in size in a matter of weeks, they were horrifically tender to the slightest touch. Seriously, even my arms brushing them a bit too briskly was enough to bring tears to my eyes.

Luckily, this is one that is actually getting better the further along I get. Not the size, they are still unwieldy at best, but the soreness has been slowly fading away. Now, I just got to figure out how to re-balance myself, and I'll be pretty golden.

4. So Tired

I've taken three naps today, and I am still exhausted writing this post. It makes sense, as all that energy that I would normally be putting into watching Netflix or playing video games (Paper Mario: Sticker Star at the moment, if you're interested) is instead being used to make a mini human child. That, presumably, can make a lady pretty tired.

Much like what I was told about every pregnancy symptom, this one is supposed to fade after the first trimester is over, too. Seeing as I still spend my lunch hour at work sleeping in the break room, and not playing Paper Mario: Sticker Star, this has not yet been the case for me. 

Also, in a cruel twist of fate, coffee is one of my intense nausea triggers now. Go figure.

My inner turmoil in coffee bean form

That all being said, I'm sure it'll be worth it in the end. Why else would women keep doing this, on purpose in a lot of cases even, if not because the destination is worth the puke-filled sleepy journey?

On a positive note, Grey has been pretty awesome and supportive, and we don't have another child to take care of while I suffer. So really, I shouldn't complain as much.

I totally will though.

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